Please Don’t!

An open letter to all those who wish to clog my e-mail inbox:

Dear “friends” (including my mother-in-law),

As much as I like you, please stop sending me e-mails with poems/quotes/photos that come with a threat attached.  Yes, I said threat.  It’s a threat thinly disguised as an “if, then” statement.  You know the ones.  The ones that tell me that if I don’t read or pass along this poem/quote/photo, that me or someone I love will drop dead.  Or some other ridiculous garbage.

You know I don’t believe in this, don’t you?  I believe my God and creator is in complete control of my life and when bad things happen, he can and will use it for good (Romans 8:23). 

You know I delete the messages, usually without even reading them, don’t you?  Anything that tells me I have to forward to five friends or disaster will strike is a load of crap.  And definitely not worth reading.  And conversely, if it says I need to forward it to five friends so that great things will happen to me?  That’s crap, too.

I wonder if you believe it yourself.  Maybe you just like the poem.  Well, if that’s the case then do me a favor and delete the threat part of it.  Because it bothers me.  But maybe you ARE in fact superstitious and believe it.  In that case, you do realize you are passing that “threat” along to me, don’t you?  And knowing that I don’t participate in these things, are you just wishing for something catastrophic to happen?  I wonder…

Anyways, friends, I’ll gladly take an e-mail from you that is actually about real things – how you’re doing lately or what’s up with you.  In fact, I’d love to read some inspirational quote or poem.  But please, please, please spare me the superstition. 



2 thoughts on “Please Don’t!

  1. My mother is the Queen of The Forwarded Email. And no matter how many times I tell her that a) what you said, or b) I just don’t read forwards as a rule, and that c) there is no way she could possibly disguise a forward as a not-a-forward; she continues to send them. That thing? About the old dogs? And the new tricks? Yeah. I don’t think you can teach them anything.

  2. Whether or not I read forwards completely depends on my mood. The only time I might send one along, which is rare, is if it made me laugh from the bottom of my toes or made me really think. That’s a good idea to erase the threat part. I agree that IS stupid.

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