WARNING: This post is going to contain a lot of rambling, so if you’re not in the mood, come back another time!
I can’t believe it’s March already. It’s the month we’d talked about putting our house back up for sale. Ugh.
In July of 2006, we put our house on the market. We waited. And waited. And waited. In October of 2007 we finally gave up.
In those 15 months we also looked at house after house. We found our dream house. And then we lost it because we couldn’t sell ours fast enough. That happened twice – with the same “dream house”.
I still want to move. Our house is good size for us, and has fit us pretty well, but it sits on a lot the size of a postage stamp. Okay, I’m exaggerating. But it’s tiny, and definitely not big enough for three kids.
However, the thought of trying to sell it again overwhelms and exhausts me. If you’ve read any of my previous posts, you might remember that I’m not a neat freak. And therefore I have a lot of cleaning to do before our house is ready to show. Ugh. Then maintaining it to be ready to show within 24 hours…ugh.
And finding the right house – now that’s an exciting thought, although finding time to look is hard. I always have to keep in mind that what we want, what we need, and what we can afford can be three VERY different things. I’d like 4 bedrooms, at least 1 1/2 baths, a big yard, a bigger bedroom that I have now, and an eat-in kitchen. And an entryway that fits more than 2 people at a time (if you’ve been to my house, you know what I’m talking about). But can we find something that fits those criteria, that we can afford? That’s the hard part.
I’m always second-guessing myself… and God… in this matter. Why can’t we sell our house? Did I not get it clean enough? Is God trying to send me a message that I already have what I need (although it’s not what I want)? What is God trying to teach me in the waiting? Am I over-obsessing about this house hunting – making it an idol in my life? Is God trying to teach me not to be so harsh with my family when I’m trying to clean the house to show it (believe me, this lesson is a hard one for me!).
Thanks for sticking with me through my rambling… sometimes just writing about it helps me process the whole thing. I’m just praying that I will lean on God through this and that He will make His will clear to us through the process.
Is there anything you feel like rambling about these days?